How to Parent Like a Boss!
Starting With Good Intentions
Parenting is hard when you first begin, you constantly question your moves. You begin with a good intention and question your resolve by the end of the parenting moment. I don’t know how many books I read on what best method to use to bring up amazing, independent, prosperous human beings. The one thing those books left out was the one thing I needed to do first.
What is the one thing you need to do first?
You need to be an ace on yourself first. Because you can’t teach another person how amazing if you don’t know how to do it yourself. Parenting is not really about how to control the outcome but how to enjoy the journey. In the end, you are trying to set out into the world amazing strong people full of life. However, you can’t do that if you lack strength and life yourself.
Work on You First!
The Six Guidelines for Parenting Like a Boss
Show Me Love
First, effective parenting begins with your self-love. How you love yourself will teach your child how to in turn treats himself/herself. Loving who you are as a person can lessen the burden on your child by taking away any expectation to be anything other than themselves. When you exude self-love you exude self-confidence and free joy that attracts more joy and happiness, and thus makes those around you (your children) happier.
Check out my post on Self-Love
A Separate Entity
Second, think of your kids as a separate entity from yourself, because they are. Learn that your child is not there to please or meet your aspiration. They are here for their own life’s journey and growth. Let them change their minds about what they want to do, they are working on themselves so don’t push too young on a future career. Instead, focus on their passions and show interest like you would a good friend.
Children Are Their Own Entity.
Just Do You!
Third, be happy around them, work and do what makes you happy, just like they are not here to make you happy, you are not always here to make them happy. When you show respect for your needs you show them how to stand up for themselves. If a child sees you pursuing your passion and living life to the fullest, they follow suit and do the same.
Connect with Your Kids
Make Memories
Fourth, don’t be afraid of parenting, put down that book and go play chase with your kids, make cookies, or just sit and color. Spending as much time with them adds more memories and helps you feel fulfilled. This fulfillment is the stuff that gives you great memories and zero regrets (well maybe a couple here and there).
Work on Emotions
Fifth, emotional intelligence is often thought as a skill meant for children. The thought that grown-ups have it all together and are great at this skill is often misleading to young kids when they see their parents or teacher acting upset over a mistake they commit. We can’t teach something we don’t know ourselves. Learn how to become aware of your emotions and how to let them guide you but not control you. This type of intelligence is a skill that can help a child with issues that arise from anxiety, anger, and jealousy.
If Adult emotional awareness is new to you or you would like to read more on it check out Emotional Exercises to Help Let Go of Stress
The Advice of Many
Sixth, Take advice with a grain of salt because everyone has opinions, but it’s your opinion that matters in the end. Don’t let happy/angry jappers ruin your day, let their opinions on what you do slide off you. Like they say “Opinions are like @#**holes, everyone has one” but it’s yours that you carry around.
Read more on Dealing with Unwanted Advice in Parents.
The Ultimate Goal
I am by far not a perfect parent, but it’s not my goal. My goal is to raise amazing freethinking adults. Your job should lead to an empty nest and birds in flight. If you can say “they never call me because they are so in love with their lives”, then you’ve done a great job. Take it as a compliment when a child dreamily looks up and says “I can’t wait to leave and be an adult “because that is a sign of a child who trusts you and loves you, that it has made them feel safe to trust you with their dreams.
Set Their Souls Free
Finally
Don’t forget to parent like a boss, we don’t know it all, and our kids don’t care. So be free of the pressure for perfection and get out of your own way. Love yourself, let them be themselves, be happy around them, have no regrets, control your emotions, and let people have their opinions. Happy Parenting my Fellow Consequencesers!
What are your parenting concerns?
How has society influenced how you feel about your own parenting?
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